Saturday, November 28, 2009

Wade Boggs's Guide To Premier Fan Fiction

so you want to write fan fiction. and who can blame you? surely you're a fan of something, and maybe the something is fiction. i don't know. maybe that something is baseball!

the first step to writing fan fiction is to have a stupid idea. this idea will involve sex. maybe you want to make Mary Poppins give the ol' "spoonful of sugar" to a rhinoceros. a rhinoceros! chim chiminey chim chim cheroo!

now that you have your idea, it is time to execute! this pretty much involves taking the sex, which you proposed in the above hypotenuse, and making it happen. no, not really! with words! on the Internet? yes!

that's really all there is to it. SO next time you want to see Hank Hill blushing at the sight of Madame Bovary's ovaries (or see Don Mattingly tongue-wrestling with Tommy Lasorda for the hand of Judy Blume), just know that you're only an Internet away!

this post was proudly brought to you by Werewolves Which Love Women Who Love Vampires, the number one movie in America and the world's most popular fan fiction.